I am not even quite sure where the bank featured in the Onion photo is located (although, if it still exists, I would love to add it to the blog), but I know that the good people of East Orange can sympathize with it. But really, a bank in an old Pizza Hut is nothing to be ashamed of. It is probably a lateral move, if anything.
So stand proud, Valley National Bank. You have nothing to be embarrassed about. Besides maybe the fact that you live in New Jersey.
Submitted by Steve, who probably also lives in New Jersey.