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Monday, February 24, 2014

Dragon China in Moraine, OH

Submitted by Danny, Dragon China in Moraine, Ohio is a great UTBAPH. First of all, Chinese restaurants love making it very clear exactly what they are, using a small, repeating set of words in their names (dragon, king, jade, garden, buffet, dynasty, rice, wok, super, China). Basically, pick two random words from that list, buy an old Pizza Hut, and you have everything it takes to open your own Chinese restaurant.Just to illustrate my point, here is a list of a few random combinations of the words above:
  • Dragon Buffet
  • Super China
  • Rice Garden
  • King Dragon
  • Jade Garden
  • Dynasty Buffet
  • Rice Wok
If some of those names look familiar to you, it is because I just named 75% of all of the Chinese restaurants in North America (the other 25% are P.F. Changs).The second thing that makes this particular UTBAPH so great is that they kept that original roof. That shiny, metallic-looking original roof is really going extinct these days, and it is good to come across a restauranteur who has too much of a sense of history (and/or is too lazy) to replace the roof.And then, thirdly, I love how China has one font. You know exactly which font I mean. It is as if the whole of China had a meeting one day and just decided, "This is our font. We will use it on soy sauce packets, chopsticks, restaurant signage, menus, and, yes, even video games from now on."

So next time you are in Moraine, Ohio, or, hell, even in Dayton proper, do yourself a favor and get down to the Super China Double Dragon Garden Rice Wok Dynasty Buffet. Or whatever the hell it was called.